Text 30 Dec 7 notes Goodbye

Goodbye, Cho’gath. You’ve been a grand friend, ever since that fateful meet and beat, in Las Vegas did end. Goodbye, Aatrox you’ve been such a joy, and goodbye, Grylos: you’ve been a wonderful whipping boy. 

Goodbye, Zhu, Sona, Leona and Ira. Katarina dearest, and my piles of clones: Especially the ones who left me alone.

To Vayne, dearest Vayne, I dedicate my last trick.
In the hopes that at last, you get one final kick.

Here it goes! I’m all in! For the long haul back home.
That’s all she wrote, so try not to moan.
I’m sorry to say: the fat lady has sung.
That’s all folks, my bell is rung.

Text 30 Dec 11 notes Yo!

I guess that since my good friend Cho’gath is going to be hanging up his hat, I suppose it’s time to retire the ol’ hat and bells. It’s been a lot of fun being moderately well known among the community as both Manly Teemo, Lucian the Purifier, and Jarvan Lightshield. Hopefully I’ve been able to bring some joy, or intrigue or fun to your lives. I’m so thankful for the friends I’ve met through the community, and I’m glad I got to enjoy this last bit of silliness with you all. Good luck, friends and followers, and good night.

- Pat, from Texas.

Text 17 Dec 3 notes We gonna run this rift tonight

It’s crazy how from high to low elo, errybody playin’ vayne in solo
I bring the tumbles, tricks, pain, let’s go tho. Next time you team fight, get right, lolol.
I got escorts, whole team supports, “Get more wards, don’t get caught, whores!”
Enemies run from me, lookin’ like a crash course; now they on all fours bitchin’; no discourse.
I’m onna killing spree, you can’t catch me. Bodies piled so high, that Jeffery Dahmer wannabee. 20-minute late game, police too late; bounty on my name that make Bruce Wayne salivate.
If I lose, my team too heavy, but I never lose - I just carry, all you mothafuckas just so scared of me, bow down at my feet - I never say G.G.

Text 14 Dec 30 notes BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD

askdefinitelyvayne:

askvanyewest:

askdefinitelyvayne:

SLOW DOWN THERE, SAILOR. I DON’T EVEN LIKE MYSELF. I HATE MYSELF. AND ALSO AM REALLY UPSET ALL THE TIME ABOUT MY DEAD FAMILY EVEN THOSE GREAT NOT-EVEN-BLACK-MAGICK-USING GUYS AATROX AND CHO’GATH ADOPTED ME/US. 

SAILOR?! ARE YOU TELLING ME WE’RE ON A SHIP RIGHT NOW? I DON’T EVEN UNDERSTAND RIGGING. OR PULLEYS. All I do is tumble and grumble. Tumble and grumble! GRUMBLE GRUMBLE.

YOU FORGOT BROODING AND HAVING OBNOXIOUS HAIR.

DON’T YOU EVEN GO THERE, SISTER. HAVE YOU SEEN THIS CAT SUIT? MY THIGHS CHAFE LIKE NOBODY’S BUSINESS, AND I’M NOT IN THE MOOD FOR YOUR OFFHANDED COMMENTS ABOUT MY HAIR

Text 14 Dec 30 notes BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD

askdefinitelyvayne:

SLOW DOWN THERE, SAILOR. I DON’T EVEN LIKE MYSELF. I HATE MYSELF. AND ALSO AM REALLY UPSET ALL THE TIME ABOUT MY DEAD FAMILY EVEN THOSE GREAT NOT-EVEN-BLACK-MAGICK-USING GUYS AATROX AND CHO’GATH ADOPTED ME/US. 

SAILOR?! ARE YOU TELLING ME WE’RE ON A SHIP RIGHT NOW? I DON’T EVEN UNDERSTAND RIGGING. OR PULLEYS. All I do is tumble and grumble. Tumble and grumble! GRUMBLE GRUMBLE.

Text 14 Dec 30 notes BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD

askdefinitelyvayne:

I WILL CUT YOU WITH MY SILVER-BLADED KNIFE THAT DEFINITELY WORKS REALLY WELL AGAINST EVIL STUFF.

WE FIGHT TO THE DEAF.

LET’S JAM.

Woah. Do you seriously think I’m evil? You’re me! I also have a silver bladed knife! I’m relatively certain, that though the nature of evil is relative, we would just actually be cutting each other open, and sticking our fingers into the hole-bits. I say we have a verbal knife fight. Or… can we just make out?

Text 14 Dec 30 notes BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD

askdefinitelyvayne:

SPEAKING WITH ME IS LIKE BOXING WITH MIRRORS.

YOU WILL GET GLASS SHARDS IN YOUR HANDS.

Woah. I like to hurt people’s hands. You like to hurt people’s hands. My mind sees two outcomes here. Either, A) We work together to deliver a righteous hand-breaking unto all things evil, or B) WE HAVE A SICK NASTY VAYNE ON VAYNE KNIFE FIGHT.

TO THE DEAF.

Text 14 Dec 30 notes BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD

askdefinitelyvayne:

BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD BROOD 

DOORB DOORB DOORB DOORB DOORB

DOORB DOORB DOORB DOORB DOORB DOORB DOORB DOORB DOORB DOORB DOORB DOORB DOORB DOORB DOORB DOORB DOORB DOORB DOORB DOORB DOORB DOORB DOORB DOORB DOORB DOORB DOORB DOORB DOORB DOORB

Text 14 Dec 29 notes I SURE DO LOVE DEMACIA

askdefinitelyvayne:

askchogath:

askluxnotchogath:

askchogath:

askluxnotchogath:

YOU ARE ALMOST AS MUCH OF A LOSER AS SHACO.

FUCK YOU, I AM NOT A LOSER, I’LL SURGICALLY REPLACE YOUR LIVER WITH A BROOM. IT WON’T EVEN FIT IN YOUR STUPID BOD- Errr. I uhh mean. LOOK AT ME, I’M CHO’GATH. HOWDY HOWDY HOWDY HOWDY.

AT LEAST NEITHER OF US IS VAYNE.

I CAN BE IF YOU LIKE.

I CAN BE VAYNE AS WELL.

Woah. Quiet down. How are we going to be sneaky if you don’t WEAR SHUTTER SHADES?!?!

Text 14 Dec 7 notes The night is my veal

That’s right. Baby cows.


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